Sunday, February 21, 2010
The Dork is out of the closet
I don't know what came over me, but two days ago I decided this blog belonged to me. I'm bossy like that. The timing felt right. This blog debuted a year ago this week as "Our Group", and oh my, what a difference a year has made in me. It feels eerily like those bad dreams where you walk up onto the stage to accept your diploma, and you realize you aren't wearing clothes. I have been exposed. Many times I have wanted to scream, "Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!" when I have let go of a few personal secrets too many. Before now, I could always try to hide behind "Our Group", but I'm through with that. I'm coming out.
The premise was simple: six highly creative, forty-something high school friends and one closeted dork (yeah, that would be me) would contribute interesting essays to the "Our Group" blog for our clique-ish reading pleasure. The only problem was that the talented members have a life. The folks that actually have writing talent spend the better part of their days in the real world instead of the virtual, unlike me. I slowly realized that they had no desire to wax poetic over their dead relatives or show their remorse over how badly they tend to sunburn. They felt no urge to expound on the virtues of wine or proclaim their deep and abiding love of autumn, but I did. I chastised them for abandoning the blog like a pregnant mistress, but in reality, I was giddy.
What emerged in me is a true love of taking these inane thoughts that are swimming in my head and molding them into prose for all the world to see. Actually though, I think only three people read it, but let's not step on my dream, people. This quiet, brooding middle-age mom has something to say even if she's the only one who sees it. (Sorry, too much Facebook time causes talking in third person.)
Since my friends have graciously relinquished their custodial rights, I have taken the poor orphan-child blog and adopted it as my own. I had to. It knows me too well to live with anyone else. I gave it a make-over that would make Stacey and Clinton proud. The blog and the dork are together at last, and now that my face is at the top of the page, I'm sure I'll never have another creative thought in my head again...